So In Love With The Wrong World

So In Love With The Wrong World...
(AU)
It seems that I have been held
In some dreaming state
A twist in the waking world
Never quite awake

My eyes opened slowly and I turned to stare out the window of our classroom, I wasn't one to usually sleep in class but today was an exception, I hadn't gotten much sleep last night, I had been hearing things lately, noises, ones that concerned me, screams and blood curling howls... and crashes and explosions had been taking place near my apartment lately and I couldn't stand it, it always worried me because no one knows what's causing them, atleast... they didn't.... I stared absent-mindedly at the clock and nearly cheered in glee when the minute hand struck twelve and the bell rang, "YUS!" I chirped as I stood up and stretched, grabbing my books and other school supplies and getting ready to leave for the day, I glanced over then at the eye of my affections: Ichigo Kurosaki, my heart was having palpatations just staring at him and I felt my face turn red and my palms get sweaty, I took a step forward and clumsily tripped over my own shoe, my books went everywhere and I prepared myself for impact on the harsh tile floor ... but never felt it... looking up, I stared into the warm brown eyes that I had come to love and felt my face get even hotter, "Are you ok?" he asked quietly as he let go of me and bent down to get my things, "O-O-Oh yeah!! J-Just fine!" I replied with a slight giggle, he handed me my things back and stood, towering over me, I looked up at him and he seemed to have an expression of unease about him, "Are you sure?" "Y-Yes! I didn't hit the ground or anything, you um.. saved me from that... I just uh lost my balence," I said with another nervous laugh as I reached back and rubbed my neck before taking my things from him, he nodded to me once and we both heard someone shout his name, "I'm coming I'm coming," he hollered back, grumbling something under his breath and waving shortly to me before dissapearing in the crowd of people; I never did see who called him that day but the more I think about it the more certain I am of who it was

No kiss, no gentle touch
Could wake me from this slumber
Until I realized
That it was you who held me under

That night I dreamed of him, that in it's self was not an uncommon occurance... it was the TYPE of dream that was bothering me... we were alone in his room, eating pastries together and laughing and I felt so happy that I could swear it was real... and he leaned over and touched my hand, his thumb brushing across the back of my hand like a feather, I could almost feel my heart coming out of my chest as he leaned forward to kiss me, but right before he did the window in his room exploded and someone with dark black hair and cold green eyes walked in, he looked... inhuman..... with his black fingernails and pasty pale skin, the green tattoos that trailed under his eyes like tears and the paleness of his stark wite clothing, not to mention the wite boney structure on one half of his head, it looked almost like an animal skull... that was when Ichigo stood up and his normal t-shirt and jeans errupted in a cloud of black and turned into a black kimono, he had a huge sword that was as tall as he and he looked down at me coldly before rushing towards the other man and attacking him, it was at this point that my entire body began shaking and I burst from the nightmare like I was emerging from water, gasping for air after holding my breath for too long, despite knowing logically that this was just a dream I couldn't help but feel that this dream turned nightmare was much more, the next day when I saw him he barely spoke to me, wich wasn't unusual, he and I just didn't talk much, but this... this was even more different... this was as if he was suffering from something, like something precious had been taken from him, and I got the sick feeling the longer the day progressed that the reason he was feeling the way he so obviously felt was somehow connected with the man with the cold green eyes... I swore to myself that it was nothing more than a dream but as days went on and I didn't see Ichigo anymore I started to question that, why would he just dissapear after all? It made no sense.... none of this made sense...

Felt it in my fists
In my feet
In the hollows of my eyelids
Shaking through my skull
Through my spine and down through my ribs

Ichigo was away for months, after the first week of not seeing him I went to his house and confronted his father, who simply said that he was away on a trip and gave no other details except that he'd be happy to give his son a message for me, I declined, I had nothing I could really say, but from then on my unease turned to worry and my worry turned to a sick feeling that something was very, very wrong... even more disturbing was the fact that I continued having the same nightmare over and over again... except it wasn't quite the "same", there were differences every time I had it, at first it was Ichigo and the man with the green eyes charging at eachother, but then, as soon as Ichigo disappeared, a new player came into my dreams, she was gorgeous, and, despite having the classic looks of long, light hair, light eyes, and an hour glass figure, I couldn't stop myself from feeling extreme jealousy over her mature and model-esque appearence, her hair was raven-black and short, going down to her shoulders and fanning out in a shaggy kind of style, she was so short too, probbably atleast four inches or so shorter than me.. atleast... her skin was pale but not in a sickly way, in a snowy way, and her figure was petite, thin without looking like she had an eating disorder, and strong, muscular, without looking too much like a boy, I couldn't see her face though, all I saw was her back, she wore the same black robes that Ichigo did and although in my dreams I knew very well that she called to him, instructed him, helped him, I never once heard her voice, as time went on the dream progressed and I didn't wake up simply after Ichigo charged the man with the green eyes, the more I dreamt, the more graphic the fight became, blood splattered everywhere and I sometimes heard the sickening snap of bones breaking, and this was in no way a one-sided battle, Ichigo was not the winner, not all the time, he had losses as well as the man with the green eyes, they lunged at eachother like bitter enemies in some sort of old, war-time movie, hand-to-hand, sword-to-sword, cutting and slashing eachother, breaking eachother, and it was after the dreams became violent that I started to awake in tears, my chest hurt and heaved everytime I woke up and seeing the darkness of the ceiling above me became a comfort after these dreams, I could feel myself choking on my own tears at times and my ribs would shake from the fast pace of my heart and the heavy breathing my lungs were doing, I would clutch at my chest and pray to the Gods above me that I never had those dreams again, but it never did any good, every night, for as long as Ichigo was gone, I had those dreams, but then... suddenly, things changed

No more dreaming of the dead as if death it's self was undone
No more calling like a crow for a boy
For a body in the garden
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love, so in love
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love so in love
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love with the wrong world

One night, the dreams abruptly stopped, one night there was no more violence, no more fighting, no more man with the green eyes, instead, I started getting insight on the girl, the first night I had this dream it was just the two of them, they were wearing simple street clothes, Ichigo in his jeans and t-shirt, the girl in a blue dress, and as she walked beside him her height was confirmed as I once thought to be incredably short, he towered over her without even trying to, and for the first time I had a look at her face, wich was- and still is I think- one of the most beautifull things I've ever seen, she looked like she was from an old European painting, her features were striking, her black bangs fanned over her face and she had one long strip of hair from her bangs that went all the way down her face, her eyes were a stunning orchid purple that seemed to stare holes right through me, her nose, ears, and mouth were so small that they looked like they belonged on a doll, and that night that I got a glimpse of her face, she looked right at me, like she wasn't just a figment of my imagination, like she was a real person and she KNEW who I was and what I wanted, but she didn't look at me with malice or evil intent, she just looked at me, curiously, like I was a subject of interest to her, the way someone may look at a new toy, after that intense stare she went back to walking with Ichigo, they didn't touch eachother, but I could feel an intense vibration between them, as if they were connected in ways that my mind couldn't even begin to understand, the way someone woud look at an old married couple and go "Wow, they've been through everything together" ... only deeper... it was as if they were born for eachother and had been bonded together since the beginning of time, as if they knew the ins and outs of eachother without even looking, and I felt like an outsider, like I was intruding on their relationship just by standing there watching them, and it was a creepy feeling to have, as they walked, and I stared, the woman suddenly spoke, and her voice nearly nocked me off my feet, it was deep but feminine, it was smooth like melted chocolate and sank deep, deep, into my mind, unnerving me with how sugary sweet but also demanding her voice was, she was quiet, but her voice was strong and unwavering, at this point, I made a decision to call her Snow White, I had no better name for her except "Girl" and I felt that it was rude to keep calling her that, I called the man with green eyes simply "Green Eyes" at this point, but this girl- Snow White- she was distinct, she was something else, someone I had to address by a nice name, and I couldn't think of anything better, she was beautifull and had the jet black hair, snow white skin, and tiny stature that Snow White did, and even though she was strong and sometimes held an intimidating pressence above me I could tell that she was very kind and a gentle soul when she wanted to be, it was at that moment, that I watched them, that I realized Snow White may just be taking Ichigo from me

And I could hear the thunder and see the lightening crack
And all around the world was waking
I never could back

The next day it was raining, I always felt some sort of comfort in the rain, as if it were connecting Earth to the Heavens above, I decided to go out despite the weather and get some groceries, I grabbed my umbrella and started out of the apartment, despite hearing thunder rumbling in the distance, I felt this would be a short trip, I just had to grab some stuff for dinner and I'd be able to go home, thunder never bothered me anyway, it was lightening that I was scared of, I started down the street and hummed a happy tune I had heard sometime ago in my head, something about raindrops falling on my head, I twirled my umbrella happily as I got closer and closer to the store... and then I stopped... I just... froze.... where I stood, like I had seen a ghost, and in many ways I had, there was Ichigo after not seeing him for months, walking down the street as if all this time he had been in town, doing what he normally did, no change, no difference, but it was who walked BESIDE him that was alarming, there, sharing his umbrella and eagerly pointing across the street to something or other, was Snow White, I felt my nees tremble beneath the weight of my body and I wanted to collapse on the ground, how could this be? How could a girl who I had made up in my imagination, who inhabbited my mind and made her home in my dreams, be materialized right in front of me? She was exactly the same and unmistakable, even though it seemed like she had been out in the rain as she was a bit damp, her beauty was unmistakable, she was even wearing the same clothes, part of me wanted to run over to her and ask her to speak so I could confirm my suspecions that Snow White was standing right in front of me, but the other half wanted to run away, maybe go to a mental institution to make sure that I was all right in the head... but before I could do either they both disapeared in a crowd of people, I leaned against a store window, not caring how wet my clothes were getting, and felt a tightness in my chest, I felt like I was gonig crazy, and I didn't know what to do about it

'Cause all the walls of dreaming
They were torn right open
And finally it seemed
That the spell was broken

The following Monday I went back to school and half-expected not to see Ichigo there, I had seen him- or thought I had seen him atleast- on a Saturday, if he really was in town there was some reason he hadn't been going to school, but once again I was wrong, after seeing him with Snow White that day my dreams once again started to turn violent, but this time there were too many players in them to count, although a few recurring ones also had names for them, there was the red-haired, tattooed man who seemed to be a freind of Snow White's, I called him Doc, after one of the dwarves in the Snow White fairytale, there was a blue-haired man with a jawbone on his face who seemed to know Green Eyes, I called him Mr. Blue, there was a man who once had glasses who had apparently gotten contacts and seemed to be against Ichigo and his group, and for Mr. Blue and Green Eyes, I called him Clark Kent, I don't really know why though, he just reminded me of him, there were plenty of other people who I hadn't given a nickname to yet and I wondered if I was gonig crazy, that Monday, as I sat in my seat, I started making a diagram of who was who and a timeline of when I started dreaming about them, I even started doodling them, I considered myself to be fair at art, and at the very top of the list? Ichigo; I was so engrossed in my work that I didn't even notice someone stand behind me and breathe down my neck, "Why am I written in your book?" I jumped and my head slammed into his chin, making him wobble backwards and curse, "O-O-Oh my gosh! I'm so incredably sorry!" I shouted as I glanced back at Ichigo, who held his jaw and groaned as he staggered back to his stance, "N-No I'm sorry for scaring you," he grunted, he stared at me expectingly and I gulped, I didn't really know how to answer that problum... "Um well... see... I'm uh.. writing a book! About... princesses and stuff! And I'm naming the prince after you!" I replied with a laugh, he stared at me for a moment, "Hm... I don't know if I'd really be a very good prince..." he muttered, looking down at the papper again, his eyes immediately fixated on Snow White and the sketch I had of her, "Who's this?" he asked, he sounded half-curious and half-worried, like my knowledge of her was a problum or something, I felt my palms start to sweat again and I took in a deep breath to calm myself, "Oh! I haven't come up with a name for her yet.. .I just call her Snow White since she's so pretty and she kind of looks like her," I replied with a smile to him, he continued to stare, he looked disturbed by the drawings but I was just happy to have him talking to me, "Hn... I don't know if Snow White is such an accurate description..." he muttered back, I blinked at him, he seemed to be talking more to himself than to me, "If you're naming her after a princess I think you'd be much better off calling her Mulan... or maybe Rapunzal..... nah.... Mulan..." he muttered to himself, I looked at him and leaned back a bit, "What happened to your arm?" I asked, he jerked out of his daze and stared at his bandeged arm, gripping it slightly, "Nothing... just bumped against a door the other day," he replied quietly, walking away, I sighed, I shouldn't have said anything, maybe I would have gotten some more information from him if I had just let him keep rattling on to himself... but this was interesting still, clearly I wasn't delusional, she was real, Snow White was real, and I was determined to figure out who she was

All my bones began to shake
My eyes flew open
All my bones began to shake
My eyes flew open

That day I followed Ichigo home, I knew it was bad and a little stalker-ish but I couldn't help myself, I just had to, he didn't seem to notice either, really absorbed in his own thoughts, when he went in the house I frowned, noticing that I would get nowhere just standing outside staring at the house, it was then I noticed that the window of his bedroom was open, I thought that was a little strange since there was no way he could already be upstairs, he had just moments ago shut the door... I looked up at the window and stared for a moment, suddenly I felt my heart nearly stop, there was Snow White, walking towards the window and shutting it before dissapearing again, she was there... was she living with him? I just didn't understand... taking in another deep breath I shut my eyes breifly and went back to the door, I rang the door bell and a few moments later Ichigo's sister Yuzu answered, I explained to her that I had misunderstood some of the instructions for our homework and asked if I could go ask Ichigo about them, she invited me in happily and I immediatley went up to his room, not bothering to nock, I wanted to catch her, I wanted to catch Snow White right there, I opened the door as my bones shook within me and I could barely contain myself, and there they were, Snow White sitting on Ichigo's bed and Ichigo standing in front of her with a book open, they both looked in my direction and I once again felt like an intruder, gulping, I stepped in and shut the door behind me, "U-Um... hi," I said, he stared for a moment and shut the book, "Orihime, what are you doing here?" he asked quietly, I cleared my throat and smiled, "I came to borrow your notes, I misunderstood something about the homework, I think I wrote it down wrong," she replied with a small smile, he nodded slowly and went to his desk, I guess to get the notes, leaving myself and Snow White staring right at eachother, I wasn't sure what I expected, maybe something wild and crazy like her turning into some mythical creature and attacking me or dissapearing into thin air or something.. but none of that happened, instead, she slid off the bed and walked over to me until she was standing right in front of me and I confirmed her height, despite being taller than her however, I felt very intimidated, almost as if I were staring at a giant, she suddenly dropped her head and bowed respectfully to me, reaching her hand out, "You must be one of Ichigo's freinds from school, I'm Rukia Kuchiki, it's nice to meet you," she said with a smile, I felt my world shatter, she was as nice as I thought when I first saw her and I felt so wrong for thinking anything bad of her... I felt like I was not only intruding now, but like I was the one trying to take Ichigo from HER... it was the strangest feeling of not belonging, I boweed and shook her hand, "I'm Orihime Inoue! It's nice to meet you too .. uh.. Rukia... was it?" I replied happily, so now I had an actual name for her instead of Snow White, although I couldn't help but feel that the woman in my dream was not the same, sweet person standing here, maybe I was wrong, maybe I had really actually seen her before and she WASN'T Snow White, I just moddled Snow White after her in my head, "Here are the notes," I heard, looking over at Ichigo as he handed them to me, I hesitantly reached out and accepted, thanking him quietly and excusing myself, "Orihime," Rukia called before I was out the door, I turned around and saw her same, polite smile and that curious glint in her eyes like a cat wanting to pounce on a mouse, "We should meet up sometime, I feel like we'll be good freinds," I just nodded slowly to her and she told me that she would have Ichigo set up a time and place for the three of us to meet, after that I accepted, excused myself again, and left, feeling shaken and excited about the same time, I felt like I had just fallen through the rabbit hole into Wonderland, or maybe it was more like stepping through the wardrobe into Narnia... because I did it all knowing that I may uncover something strange...

No more dreaming of the dead as if death it's self was undone
No more calling like a crow for a boy
For a body in the garden
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love, so in love
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love, so in love
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love with the wrong world

That night the dreams changed again, and this time I was seeing things that I felt like were possibly from the past, Ichigo in his black robes, Rukia-or Snow White, I still wasn't sure yet- in a simple white yukata, he was holding her her and fighting people to keep herself and it made me long for that interaction of my own, made me long for him, it was sad in a way, I felt sad for myself, things fast-forwarded and I was seeing myself in the third person, wearing all white, a strange looking dress really... and talking to Green Eyes, Ichigo and Rukia-Snow White- stood off to the side staring at me with concern, almost like they were judging me, and then Ichigo charged Green Eyes and Rukia-Snow White- chased after me, she grabbed my hand and I took the moment to revel in how soft and smooth her skin was, and then she pulled me aside, taking me away before the violence began, and for only the second time in my dreams she acknowledged me, "You don't want to see this," she said as she dragged me away, "Orihime you don't need to be here, this isn't your world," I couldn't understand what she meant by that but as I looked at her I couldn't help but to understand what she was saying, in a way, "My world...?" I muttered quietly, "This is our world, not your's, you don't belong here," her words cut like an icey steele blade, slicing into me, and I felt so strange, so alone... like I had been rejected, excluded, and we stopped suddenly in a dark corridor, she turned to me and stared, "I'm sorry," she said, I felt surprise jerk through my body and she stared at me again, "I don't mean it like that, but you just don't need to be here, you'll be happier in your own world instead of mine," she said, I blinked, I didn't understand, I didn't understand at all what she was trying to tell me, what was the difference between her world and mine? Why couldn't I be in her world? And why was she so secretive? Did it have to do with Ichigo or Green Eyes? I wondered ... I just didn't understand... "Orihime," she said, "I beg of you, don't involve yourself in these affairs, just stay in your own world and be happy there," I still didn't understand but at that moment her hand slipped out of mine and she dissapeared from my line of sight, I bit my lip and looked down, I wish I knew what she meant.. I wish I understood more of all this mystery.. but until I figured out something, until I got more unformation, it was just that; a mystery...

Snow White is stittching up the circuitboards
Someone's slipping through the hidden door
Snow White is stittching up the circuitboards...

I was getting used to these dreams, it was hard to explain but I had accepted them very much as a part of my every day life style, the same way someone adapts to any change I suppose, except that this WASN'T just any change... this was a huge change, a change of my lifetime, and I could tell it was effecting me, I was always tired now, I wasn't as chipper as I once was, I would only nod and quietly agree when talking to my freinds and my life was slipping between my fingers the more time moved on... and I hated it... I regretted that first dream I had had of Ichigo and myself and I was regretting ever going deeper into the mystery, day after day I would see them together and day after day my longing for Ichigo would get smaller and smaller, like a light going dim, until I found myself so drained of energy I didn't even know what the point was in all this, it was at that point that I came to a full awareness, at this point I could see the world around me that had previously been hidden from me, I was walking robotically towards school as I had become acustomed to doing in the last couple of weeks when I heard an explosion, instincetively I ducked and looked up, and there they were; my dream, my dreams were coming true before my very eyes... Ichigo was in his black robes and held his sword steady like an expert, he charged forward at the man I had come to know as Mr. Blue, with the blue hair and the jaw bone on the side of his faace, I turned and there was Snow White- Rukia- who was fighting someone else from one of my dreams, this was a blond man who I had only seen once before, she swung a crystal, snow white blade and ice shot forward from it, incasing the man, I just stared in complete and utter amazement, unsure of what to do or where to go, unsure of weather or not I had actually lost my mind or if I was really quite sane and was just opening myself to a new world around me, I watched, and almost instantly found myself across the street away from the battle, looking up I saw that it was not Ichigo who had carried me away, but Rukia, "I thought I asked you not involve yourself in my world," she said coldly, setting me down on a bench, "I'm sorry Orihime, we've involved you too much, now it's too late," she said grimmly, before dissapearing

No more dreaming of the dead as if death it's self was undone
No more calling like a crow for a boy
For a body in the garden
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love, so in love
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love, so in love
No more dreaming like a girl
So in love with the wrong world

It was then that the horrible, terrible truth occured to me; I hadn't heeded their warnings, those dreams were not simply nightmares that my mind plagued me with as I had previously thought, they were warnings from a higher power, one I was previously unaware of, silently warning me to stay away from their world, to forget Ichigo and everything going with him, unless I too wanted to get caught up in all of this, I bit my lip, I had ignored them, foolishly ignored them and persued a childish crush on my first love, persued, and gotten too caught up in the enchantment and the moment, the mystery and the romance, I had lost my mind for a wile there and was now paying for it by being "blessed", blessed with the sight to see what was really going on around me, and the thought that I had inflicted this on my self made me sick to my stomach, I didn't know how Ichigo got involved in this and I barely even could comprehend what "this" was, other than something I should have no part of ... I could feel my body start to shake as fear overtook me, fear and the realization that Ichigo never was and never would be mine, he was caught up in a world that I just wasn't meant to be a part of and I was already too involved, but not like Ichigo, Ichigo had embedded himself so deep into the netting of this secret world that I saw no way out for him, I could no longer turn a blind eye to the dangers and horrors around me but maybe, just maybe I could still save myself from throwing my life towards it as Ichigo seemed to have done, I had to drop the idea of being with him all together if I were to perserve my sanity, but it was then that I had to ask myself the most important question of all; did I WANT to leave this world behind? Surely there was some reason I investigated so thoroughly, is it maybe possible... that I actually wanted to be part of this mysterious world around me... is that it? Was that why I suddenly had a sight that I didn't have before?

Snow White is stittching up the circuitboards
Someone's slipping through the hidden door
Snow White is stittching up the circuitboards
Someone is slipping through the hidden door

As I sat there contemplating I saw a familiar pressence emerge before me, it was Ichigo and Rukia, he gave me a short look before turning his attention back to Rukia, who took her sword from it's sheath and thrust it into the air, before I knew it a set of old looking double doors appeared right there in thin air, they started to open and I saw Ichigo run his fingers through her hair and she looked up, and much to my heartache he pressed his lips over her's, I could barely stand to sit back and watch as she tugged at him and he held her hand before she started leading him into the open double doors, first she dissapeared into them, and then he followed right after, and the doors closed, I felt like she had taken him away forever, I had the sinking feeling that he would never return to this world, I wasn't sure what to think, what to do, I just had no idea at all.... "Woman," I heard, I looked up and there was Green Eyes staring right at me, his cold expression didn't phase me and I stood up, almost expecting his next words, "Come with me,"