My Heaven

My Heaven
"Ugh.... guuuh.... nag... RUKIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!"

"What is WRONG with you Man!?"

My eyes flung open and I shot up in bed like a bullet

My heart pounded a mile a minute and I was so covered in sweat that I felt like my clothes weighed more than I did..

As I fumbeled around like a blind kitten to turn on my desk lamp my thoughts slowly started to gather themselves

I finally heard the satisfying CLINK of my lamp and the blinding but dim light it shed throughout the room

I glanced at my fingers as they lingered, wrapped around the chord, and noticed the scars that littered my hand

Though to my major releif they weren't new scars... they were old...

"Ichigo?" I heard

And suddenly every ounce of fear or worry or doubt or anything else.. BAD.. that haunted me just dissapeared... evaporated... like water that turned into steam

I slowly turned around and saw a VERY angry woman staring back at me

Her shoulder-length black hair was tied up into a side poneytail and her eyes were narrowed

Her nose was scrunched up and her lips pursed

Her hands were on her hips and her shoulders were tense

Her neck and collarbone were tastefully exposed as her smoothe skin dissapeared into the polka-dot nightgown she was wearing

I made sure to study every single outline of her body, especially the bump under her nightgown where our baby was

And finally I let out the breath that I had been holding for what felt like hours

"If you wake me up one more time tonight SO HELP ME Ichigo!" she screamed at me

I rubbed the back of my neck and felt sweat drip onto my fingers, I bit my lip and tasted a faint salty iron from my blood, likely, my lip had split open because I opened my mouth too fast and screamed

Maybe she's right

Maybe I SHOULD start wearing chapstick to bed...

"Sorry.." I muttered, a little surprised at just how hoarse my voice was

She sighed and her muscels relaxed, her arms slid back onto her pillow and her head dipped down a little as she leaned back

"If it isn't the baby it's YOU, my OTHER baby," she grumbeled at me and I immedatly felt rotten for waking her up after she had just gotten back to sleep from our child's reletnless kicking

Make no mistake though

When the baby kicks she stays awake, and I stay awake too, she ENSURES that

"What was it this time?" she finally asked me, ruling that she was too tired to be angry

"It was a horrible one... the one about not being able to see you anymore?"

"Ah, THAT nuisence," she said with a nod

That dream was so disturbing...

I would wake up in my room and my powers would be gone and... Rukia would tell me goodbye and fade from my vision

OH how that ACHED...

She rolled out of bed and walked over to the closet, her tiny feet gracing over the carpeted floor

"I swear, we need to get you hypnotized or something to make that dream go away," she said as she threw open the closet door

I had been having that dream since the end of the war

And I really did wake up in my room with my powers gone and Rukia really did dissapear for a wile

It had hurt so badly...

I could never imagine a pain worse than your partner just... vanishing... you can't see her.. and she can't speak to you...

Thankfully my dad maneged to get my powers back for me a matter of weeks later but oh was that torture...

Granted I'm nothing like I was

Things are alot diffrent

But I don't care

I don't care how my powers work or how strong they are because I can still protect

And Rukia is still HERE by my side

Two years later

She's still here

Throwing a pair of shorts at my face

"If you expect to touch me I expect clean clothes," she demanded, ducking into our bathroom and tossing a stick of deoderent my way as well

"You're SO sympathetic," I mocked

Changing from my sweat pants to my running shorts as quickly as I could

"Don't be like that, you know it hurt me too," she said

I could hardly imagine what she must have gone through either...

Being able to see me

To feel me

To hear me

And not be reciprocated

It must have been like talking through a glass wall

"If your leg hair pokes me again I'm shaving you in your sleep,"

I laughed fakely as she crawled back into bed but the scarey part is, as I found out our first summer night together, she comes through on threats like that

I cringed at the memory of Renji pointing out to me that she had gotten me one June night when I had torn the sheets off the bed and undoubtably held her hostage

The day after I waltzed into a meeting in some shorts due to the heat and every man in the building fell over laughing, it was almost as bad as the time when she got a little too happy with her Sharpies and decided my chest needed a bunny on it...

I don't care though

She can shave my legs, my arms, my head, anything she wants if she'll just stay by my side... if I can just.... FEEL her... for the rest of eternity

And I'll let the rabbits slide too

She put one delicate hand on my chest for balence and used the other to yank on the chord of the lamp and turn the light out

Her hand slipped from my chest and I was then impacted by her head in it's place

My arms snaked around her and I held her as closely as I could without smothering her

THIS..

THIS was my heaven